Hold the front page! Breaking important news...maybe

Does exactly what it says on the tin. Some of the nonsense contained herein may be very loosely related to The Sisters of Mercy, but I wouldn't bet your PayPal account on it. In keeping with the internet's general theme nothing written here should be taken as Gospel: over three quarters of it is utter gibberish, and most of the forum's denizens haven't spoken to another human being face-to-face for decades. Don't worry your pretty little heads about it. Above all else, remember this: You don't have to stay forever. I will understand.
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Pista
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Hey magpies! Behold your god
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The controversy over apostrophe-gate rumbles on.
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Wear your pancake with pride
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With helpful video of what happens when you stand up on a gondola to take selfies.
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eastmidswhizzkid
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Pista wrote: ↑07 Dec 2023, 13:54 With helpful video of what happens when you stand up on a gondola to take selfies.
maaan dont go telling the fucktards shit like that! i bet its worth a days wages in Cornettos & grabbing womens arses to the gondoliers when thats happens! must be hysterical. :lol:
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And I knew the words to every song.
"Did my singing please you?"
"No! The words you sang were wrong!"
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I'm net saying this is awkward, but....
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Man "absolutely fuming" after evilbay slashes the price of his.....big Hula Hoop.
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Video shows utter carnage caused by storm Isha: Warning. Graphic.
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ribbons69
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Pista wrote: ↑23 Jan 2024, 14:06 Video shows utter carnage caused by storm Isha: Warning. Graphic.
A miracle that no one died.
"I've seen Andrew Eldritch in an ice hockey shirt onstage, and I've given him the benefit of the doubt"
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Swindon reels from storm Isha & the sheer devastation it brought with it.
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BBC News - Driver guilty of attacking gas man with chippy tea
https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-m ... e-68251369

"What happened then was wholly inappropriate and criminally wrong and in a fit of temper you threw the contents of your chip shop dinner into his face in a deliberate act intending to assault him with that dinner,"
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ruffers wrote: ↑09 Feb 2024, 22:35 BBC News - Driver guilty of attacking gas man with chippy tea
https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-m ... e-68251369

"What happened then was wholly inappropriate and criminally wrong and in a fit of temper you threw the contents of your chip shop dinner into his face in a deliberate act intending to assault him with that dinner,"
:lol: assault? I'd call that a free dinner :lol:
There is increasing evidence to suggest that Chris may have been being sarcastic.
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ruffers wrote: ↑09 Feb 2024, 22:35 BBC News - Driver guilty of attacking gas man with chippy tea
https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-m ... e-68251369

"What happened then was wholly inappropriate and criminally wrong and in a fit of temper you threw the contents of your chip shop dinner into his face in a deliberate act intending to assault him with that dinner,"
Image
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A long-debated grammatical conundrum has finally been settled.
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And now for something completely different. A man with 68 matchsticks up his nose.
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"I have fairly large nostrils and quite stretchy skin. I'm sure that helped a lot."

Fair enough.
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Pista wrote: ↑17 Feb 2024, 11:39 And now for something completely different. A man with 68 matchsticks up his nose.
Guys a f**king amateur. i can get a whole box of bryant & mays bluebells (or englands glory) up one nostril using the technique of lips<tongue<nostril. EITHER nostril i may add. & sulphur end up. when you pull them all out your nose is burning from snot-dissolved sulphur and your bogeys are blue. ;D
Well I was handsome and I was strong
And I knew the words to every song.
"Did my singing please you?"
"No! The words you sang were wrong!"
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Stop me if you've heard this one before. A one-legged robber goes to a post office. With a spoon......
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Pista wrote: ↑28 Feb 2024, 08:38 Stop me if you've heard this one before. A one-legged robber goes to a post office. With a spoon......
Image
If I told them once, I told them a hundred times to put 'Spinal Tap' first and 'Puppet Show' last.
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Well you couldn't make that up.

https://www.irishtimes.com/business/202 ... in-russia/
Vanished Wirecard executive thought to be living as Orthodox priest in Russia
Investigation by Germany’s Spiegel, Austria’s Standard and two other media outlets claims Jan Marsalek was helped escape by an erotic actress turned spy
If I told them once, I told them a hundred times to put 'Spinal Tap' first and 'Puppet Show' last.
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The white rum based adventures of Johnny Turnip, Big Tony and Puerto Rico Paul and their quest to trap a fairy.
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There you have it. Worcester has the best ducks.
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The ever growing list of things the Daily Heil classifies as woke now includes....*checks notes*.....Scones.
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It is really quite amazing we've survived this long as a species.
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